1. Rose Quartz
The main feeling associated with the death of a loved one is grief. Everybody grieves at their own rate and in their own way. Rose Quartz is a great crystal for relieving the feelings of grief, guilt, and trauma. The great thing about this crystal is it works so gently and is so supportive. A customer of mine once wore a Rose Quartz pendant during her own grieving process and texted me to say, "I think the Rose Quartz is really working!" When you receive the uplifting energy of Rose Quartz, it is not something you feel, but something you recognize. You don't feel happier, you don't feel calmer, but you notice something is missing - sadness, loneliness, and blame. Rose Quartz helps us shed and release all the negative emotions we may be facing, and restore our heart with feelings of joy and hope. To use this crystal, I would make sure it is with you through your entire grieving process. Investing in a necklace, ring, or pocket stone would be the best choice. Outbursts of emotions can hit at anytime during the grieving process. Rose Quartz is there to support the heart when it is in need and also fights against these "bursts".
Rose Quartz can especially be supportive if the loss was for a mother, grandmother, or significant female role (or nurturing role) in your life. It is also known as "the mothering crystal" because of it's nurturing properties. This crystal can ease your pain, restore your happiness, and help you care for yourself just as a mother would.
2. Lepidolite
Death can be one of the hardest transitions in our life that we face. Suddenly someone that was once a part of your life is no longer there. It may make some feel empty, some feel depressed, and some might also hold on to the idea that the person is still there. These are all common coping responses; however, the most important thing to do in the situation is let go. Lepidolite is perhaps one of the best crystals for easing transitions. We don't often think of the death of a loved one as a transition, but it surely is. This crystal will help one go through the transition of grief and also in the bigger scheme of things, it will help one understand the transition of the physical plane to the spiritual plane. It carries strong lithium levels for balance, so the feelings of anger, sadness, or anxiety will not surface as strongly. It also helps one accept tough situations as they come. If you think Lepidolite will help you, I recommend holding the crystal anytime you feel upset. Keep it in your pocket, wear it, or carry it in your purse. Spend as much time with this crystal as you can. Lepidolite can also be great if you or someone you know is facing the dying process. It may change the way you open up to and accept the idea that death is just another term for moving on to the next plane.
3. Apache Tears
Native legend tells a haunting story of the Apache Tear (below). Reading the legend may help you understand the Apache Tear and its properties. This specific stone has been used all throughout history for the grieving process. It helps prevent further drain and damage from the aura. Whenever you are feeling heavy feelings of grief, hold an Apache Tear into the light and be reminded of the story below.
“ The haunting legend about the Apache Tear is about the Pinal Apaches, who had made several raids on a settlement in Arizona. The military and some volunteers trailed the tracks of the stolen cattle and waited for dawn to attack the Apaches. The Apaches, confident in the safety of their location, were completely surprised and out-numbered in the attack. Nearly 50 of the band of 75 Apaches were killed in the first volley of shots. The rest of the tribe retreated to the cliff’s edge and chose death by leaping over the edge rather than die at the hands of the white men. For years afterward those who ventured up the treacherous face of Big Pacacho in Arizona found skeletons, or could see the bleached bones wedged in the crevices of the side of the cliff.
The Apache Women and the lovers of those who had died gathered a short distance from the base of the cliff where the sands were white, and for a moon they wept for their dead. They mourned greatly, for they realized that not only had their 75 brave Apache warriors died, but with them had died the great fighting spirit of the Pinal Apaches. Their sadness was so great, and their burden of sorrow so sincere that the Great Father imbedded into black stones the tears of the Apache Women who mourned their dead. These black obsidian stones, when held to the light, reveal the translucent tear of the Apache.”
4. Selenite
Some people are calmer during the grieving process and don't need help easing their emotions. For empaths, those who are more sensitive, and those who don't have a lot of experience with death, it may be harder to understand what is going on. The crystal I recommend for EVERYONE after someone has passed is a Selenite. This crystal is not for the emotional aspects of coping, but rather builds a connection spiritually that will remain. Selenite protects against negative energies and cleanses an area. After someone passes, this is very important to use because you are now thought of in a different plane. Selenite is also important to use after death because it connects us to the angelic realm - this includes angelic communication, guidance, etc. This crystal may help you connect to the one you lost in a bright and beautiful way. Sleep with this crystal or meditate with it if you would like to connect with the one you lost.